Vision of the Path

It’s easy to write about beauty and adventures into underwater places. That’s my happy place…the blissful realm where I feel more myself than when walking on two legs and land-bound. But when I find myself feeling consistently stuck, it’s not so easy to put into words the experience of knowing the gifts I have to give are not being fully utilized, especially when our society needs more expression of beauty and especially more expression of Ocean beauty. After all, the Ocean is our life-source.

Recently I read an article where photographer and writer Cristina Mittermeier was interviewed. She said, “But I think the thing that I was most afraid of was becoming the most mediocre version of myself.”  I realized that’s where I’m stuck….in this mediocre me. And this terrifies me because I see the incredible need our planet has for everyone that feels the call to help, to step forward…to leap forward and give the best of themselves.

It’s interesting to share the feeling of being stuck with friends. Most want to talk me out of my feelings, convince me otherwise by listing what I do. In a conversation with one of my precious friends last night, she was listing my accomplishments and I felt anger….I know what I do….but I feel stuck! Her beautiful supportive words cannot erase my experience, my knowing that I can do so much more…the feeling of being not quite where I know I can be is very challenging to wrestle with and I expect many of us feel this way.

I want to help! I want to show the world the beauty of the Ocean! The fragility of it. The delicate balance we dance when we ignore the warning signs. So where are the open doors? And why am I stuck? Finally….understanding is dawning.

Years ago I met a guy. We ‘clicked’ and the vision of my path included him…in a very powerful way. We went on dive trips, shared cycling adventures, and he was the biggest believer in my path and work I had ever known. He saw me and the work I felt called to do like no other. The path, the vision I held so strongly, was us moving forward together.

Five years have passed since we last saw each other and there have been Ocean adventures with humpback whales, sea lions, whale sharks, dolphins…incredible encounters…and these experiences have led to books and presentations and the work going out into the world. And that’s awesome! But the feeling of being stuck continued until last night when I realized I had not updated the vision of my path. In some way I was attempting to live now with an outdated script.

It’s like operating your computer with an old operating system. The new input can’t work in the old system. At some point you have to remember to update the OS and reboot. Then all the new information coming in can work smoothly, effortlessly.

I wonder how many of us operate with old visions of what we want for our lives. When something works and we feel the power of it and set the course for our lives energy rushes in to fill the dream with power. Sometimes…and perhaps many times….we forget to update our vision, our dreams, when circumstances change. We forget to update the operating system. And then the ‘computer’ freezes.

One of my favorite writers said if you believe what you are doing is really powerful, the thought forms you construct will come clear and be highly dynamic. If you have no real faith in what you are doing, your thought forms will have no clear outline. Dion Fortune wrote this during World War II when meditation groups joined together to keep Hitler from invading England….before quantum physics told us that our thoughts are impulses of energy that affect our lives in a powerful way.

Perhaps I depended on my best friend, husband, partner and dive buddy to keep me on track by his incredible support. When that was gone I was lost. And that’s exactly how my path has felt….like I was space-walking with no gravity to pull me toward a destination.

The solution? First, realize that I needed a new vision. Then, commit fully to what I believe in and believe in myself and the vision of my life….the new vision I am creating. What about you? What is the vision for your life? When is the last time you uploaded a newer version and rebooted your life? Let’s do it and get on with the work at hand. We’ve got a lot to do.