How Love Heals

Last night I dreamed I met a man that caused my heart to open and feel…deeply feel. In the dream he left because he couldn’t open his heart and trust. I woke up sad, knowing that what we had was profound and he walked away, unwilling to take a risk on love.

I laid in the dark, listening to welcomed rain and thought of Buddy, my best friend, who died almost three weeks ago. He came into my life three years after my last relationship with a man ended. My heart was so closed and I was so wounded. Buddy changed that.

He came in as a four-month-old, black and white, bundle of zoomies. Probably a mixture of boxer and Staffordshire terrier, he was the healer I needed to risk opening my heart.

Buddy climbed trees, much to my horror. But like any good parent, I supported his love of flying. He loved to ride with me, go on walks, chase squirrels, snuggle, and be an amazing cat brother.  And eventually, after moving back to the Smokies, a dog brother.

We were best friends from the beginning. 

Immediately after he passed, I was relieved he wasn’t in pain or suffering, so that eased my sadness and grief. His illness was very short and intense. But then, after the trauma of that was processed, the deep grief is left. And I’ve been feeling his loss intensely.

Yesterday, his river stone memorial marker arrived. As did the flute I ordered when he was so sick. I had always wanted a flute from JP Gomez in Sedona, so I decided to order the flute as a memorial to Buddy and his love of my flute playing. 

So tears again came as Vern and I placed Buddy’s stone over his grave and as I played the flute. And this morning, I had the dream and realized my heart had healed because of Buddy. Even his passing helped open my heart even more. I determined to stay conscious during his illness and dying. To really be present with the process of living, dying, and death. And with that, Buddy finished his work with me and was free to move on to his next ‘assignment.’

My friend Kristine wrote yesterday about how to claim your sovereign heart. Usually, our minds and hearts are synced so it’s no real surprise that her writing and my process are aligned. Here’s a link to her article: The Real Rea.son You Feel Disconnected and How to Reclaim Your Sovereign Heart.

Love opens us. When we surrender to it, it opens our hearts. When the being, that we are in relationship with, physically leaves–in whatever way they leave–it is incredibly painful…probably because we associate the love with the physical. But love transcends the physical/material realm and helps us connect with Source. It opens us to the Infinite. We expand spiritually, emotionally, mentally, and physically through love. 

Buddy’s transition from being by my side physically to being a Spirit Dog has helped me understand love more and how love survives and continues. Long after the body has turned to dust…love remains. And heals us if we keep opening and breathing and feeling the profound Infinite touching us through every breath, through every heartbeat.

Happy Tails, Buddy! You healer dog, you!