Relationships Archives -

Ah-Ha Moment!

By Simone Lipscomb | June 1, 2016

Decades ago I had a vision of living alone in a cottage as an older woman. I can’t remember the exact circumstances but it was a very strong image.

Society has certain expectations. If you are single and choose to live alone, and have the audacity to be happy, it can make others uncomfortable. One of my long-time friends recently pointed out that living alone, choosing to be single, and being happy is a lifestyle. I had never thought of it that way before and it was quite eye-opening.

I love living alone. There. I said it. I find fulfillment and happiness by myself.

Los Islotes Shot — *New friends I met diving the Sea of Cortez last autumn.*

I have friends and I travel a bit and meet new friends. It would be awesome to have a traveling companion to enjoy nature with but if not, I’m still happy. I don’t really want a live-in relationship.

It seems the world is geared to people who are in relationship. I was listening to a playlist while cycling this morning and every song was about being in a relationship…with another person. What if I just want to be in a relationship with myself? Can someone please write a song about that? And make a fun one, a happy one…please.

Not to say I haven’t been in love or that I don’t still very much love a man. But who says love has to look a certain way? Can’t I love another person without wanting a romantic, rose and chocolates kind of experience? Not that there’s anything wrong with that. But are Cinderella and Snow White really the fairy tales we want to base our lives on? We never know what happened to their happy ‘ending’ after they became self-actualized. Maybe they discovered they really wanted to live in their own castles and find joy in solitude and just invite the prince when they wanted to take a fun journey.

Creatively I am my most-productive when alone. I ride my bicycle alone with rare exception because I enjoy being out in nature with no distractions. My friend wrote me the other day and reminded me that I can choose to be happy in my life, but I have to consciously take that step. Today it all made complete sense.

Yesterday was the craziest day I’ve ever experienced but it opened me to this realization: I am happy. I like living alone and having a relationship with nature and my four-legged companions. I love and appreciate my friends and love a man that still brings wisdom to me even though we have been apart over four years. And I’m not closed to a relationship but I envision more of a traveling companion. But if he doesn’t show up, I’m still happy.

I wrote to my friend last week: I am clear that cultivating relationships with trees, ocean, earth, animals and learning to love…period…is my path. Love to depths that clears way anything that keeps me from being open to bringing through unconditional love and light.

Sometimes we need a reminder that we are already happy with what we have.

Message in a Bottle

By Simone Lipscomb | July 14, 2013

Perhaps the biggest and worst surprise of my life is that the relationship with a good man–with whom I thought I’d spend the rest of my life–dissolved…ended. I haven’t seen him in more than a year and the ghosts of who we were, when we were happy together, roam the corridors of my heart.

One of my strongest desires in this life is to have a life partner with whom to grow and play and with whom a strong bond of love will carry us through changes, trials and challenges. And yet….here I am with this heart full of love not knowing what to do with it. When a relationship ends, especially if it ends amicably, where does the love go?

It’s not like I sit around and whine and cry and gnash my teeth. Nothing like that. Life is good for me. I laugh, have fun, enjoy life. Yet I long for a partner–a spiritual, emotional, playful, fun-loving partner. So I’ve been diving deep within myself lately and doing the work on myself and asking, ever so gently, for this partnership to arrive…when the time is right.

Yesterday was spent painting my bedroom and bathroom a most beautiful, soothing color to brighten the center of my home. This soft color and lighter drapes give a fresh, open feel to my space. All day long I painted with the intention to let go of anything holding me back from being fully open to love flowing within my heart…within my being. Within my life. To dissolve all internal barriers that keep love from me. As I told my husband before we parted, “I’m not going out there looking for love. It will have to find me.”

This morning as I was walking the beach during my sea turtle nest patrol I saw a square bottle that had just washed onshore. As I walked to it I noticed paper inside. WOW! I thought, A real message in a bottle.

I stuck it in my pack and continued my walk. Savoring the mystery, waiting until the time was right to sit and open it, was my plan.

Breakfast with turtle friends at the beach, a drive back to the house and as I scurried to get a shower before meeting more friends in Fairhope, the bottle caught my attention. Oh! I forgot you, I said. I had a few minutes to spare so I sat with it.

I uncorked it and carefully began removing the contents. A sweet perfume filled the air. The first thing I unrolled was a Maya Angelou poem. Next came a Yin-Yang symbol with hearts in the swishes. Then a tiny photograph of a home on the beach. The final item was larger and quite tightly-rolled and stuffed into the bottle. I didn’t want to damage it so it took a bit of engineering but I finally got it out. It was a prayer–a beautiful prayer–that was obviously part of a wedding ceremony. Or life commitment ceremony.

As the beauty of the intention came into focus I thought back to a prayer I said at my altar just yesterday morning before staring my home transformation: When the time is right please bring my partner to me. And then I let it go after saying a BIG thank-you.

The strength of the couple’s love deeply touched me. Their message was to God and somehow at 5.45am this morning it was directed to me. And that was a God-thing, too. Anything could have been in the bottle….but this prayer, this lifting of hearts to Source was exquisite and sacred. And affirming.

The right man will arrive when the time is right. That came in loud and clear when the Universe sent me a message this morning….in a bottle no less. This treasure will serve as a reminder of great things yet to come. I am already deeply grateful.

Isn’t life amazing?