For the past several weeks the threat of oil washing ashore on the Alabama coast was not a reality so many folks here, myself included, began to wish it away. I think we were thinking that by some magical blessing we would be spared…that skimmers would sop it up before it entered Mobile Bay or coated the beaches and marsh grass here. We were in denial–a stage of grief.

During the past few days the reality of what these sacred shores is about to experience slapped us hard in the face. The photos from Louisiana are horrifying but could that really happen here?

Yesterday while walking along the beach I met and talked with several people who appeared to be in various stages of grief. Some looked dazed while other just stood and stared into the Gulf. For people living here, the Gulf of Mexico is a mother, a nurturer and provider. Those of us that grew up here love this body of water and the waters connected to it with deep passion.

I watched a child building a sand castle at the edge of the washed-up oil. If only his sand castle would keep the oil out of his kingdom. If only it was that simple.

At the Bon Secour National Wildlife Refuge oil oozed into ghost crab holes, the summer sun turning globs of oil into rivers of death. I stood in horror, knowing these delicate crabs were being poisoned and there was nothing I could do but witness and later share what I saw with others.

Later in the afternoon a furious thunderstorm drove everyone off the beach. As the sky popped pink and thunder crashed, it felt as if all of nature was thundering a collective NO!! I sat in silence under the shelter at Gulf State Park pier gazing over the huge expanse of the Gulf and was moved beyond grief to an emotion I have never known before. I felt the immensity of this mighty water and the bottomless pit of grief within me. An ocean of sadness seemed to pour from the skies, a collective agony of all creatures, all nature energies and all humans. The Gulf appeared angry and furious which only magnified my emotions.

Let us all say to the Gulf–we are sorry for allowing you to be raped and exploited. What can we do to help you, to make this right?

Two days ago I sat on the beach and watched a ghost crab at the water’s edge digging a burrow. I warned him that oil would be on the beach soon, to run up into the dunes and live there. But he would have none of it. I took video of him and photographed him, all the while trying to persuade him to move.

As I sat there I realized there is a need for all of us to bear witness to the death that results from the oil spill/flow. One of the most difficult things we can do is force ourselves to view footage of birds covered in oil, dead animals on the beach. Who wants to see such heart-wrenching images? But if these animals die in vain, if there is nobody to witness their suffering and pain, their death will be meaningless.

Let us honor these beautiful, innocent creatures by bearing witness to their plight. And then, may we join together and create the change that must be made if we are to leave a world of beauty and wonder for our children, grandchildren and generations to come.

I have been walking the beach at Fort Morgan every day this week and this afternoon, as I watched a BP four-wheeler straddle and then drive over tar balls, I knew the beginning of the end of our beautiful, sugar-white beaches had come.

What made it almost unbearable for me was the fact that the workers sped down the beach on their usual patrol. I stopped a National Guard humvee and asked them if anyone had reported the oil…No, we didn’t know it was here, they said. They also reminded me they cannot clean it up. The very nice guy told me that each agency has a ‘lane’ to drive in and nobody can cross into another agency’s lane.

Whatever….Please get somebody here to clean the beach. Never mind about stepping into someone else’s lane.

Over an hour later I see the green shirts of BP workers in the distance. A lone four wheeler comes to where I had been. The same two guys I photographed earlier actually got out of their vehicle and when they saw me, started picking up tar balls. I think they got two. I turned away and began to walk…just to see what they would do. They got back in their vehicle and left. So much for BP being there to make right their mess.

I’ve never been so angry in my life. BP–if you are going to hire people, please make sure they are INVESTED in actually doing the work! Enough of this story….it is repeated over and over again here on the Alabama coast. You don’t want people to volunteer…probably because they’d make your employees look pretty bad. Get your act together!

My brother and I went to a public forum in Mobile last night. It was hosted by SeaGrant and consisted of various representatives from agencies involved in the Gulf of Mexico oil spill/flow/catastrophe. I came away with two major realizations.

One–The Coast Guard appears to be clueless. They sent a representative that didn’t even know Rear Admiral Mary Landry had been relieved of oil spill duty. It’s not Commander Brady’s fault. He is a reservist that has been recently activated to be a liason between the Coast Guard and the public. He could answer NOTHING that was asked of him. It was a slap in the face of those attending the forum, a big ‘we don’t have time for you’ from the agency that is supposed to be in charge.

Two–The EPA and FDA are also clueless. Stan Meiburg from the EPA touted dispersants as the answer to the oil flow. Has he been around Tony Hayward too much? Seems huffing the stuff can alter good judgment. On one hand he said, “Dispersants are the least bad trade-off,” and then said, “There is a lot we do not know about long-term use of dispersants.” The FDA representative, Robert Dickey was an even bigger joke. He said that dispersants are harmless to the public and they are safe and then says there is environmental concern. Which is it Bob?

The stand-out star, in my opinion, was Buck Sutter of NOAA. He actually made sense and did a much better job of directly answering questions. At least he didn’t dance around questions about PLUMES. BP is denying they exist. Buck said there are plumes and NOAA has two ships studying them now. He stated that the water in the plumes is clear but it is full of dispersed oil. He said because the oil is so dispersed it is very difficult to detect.

Finally….we see the value of dispersants. They make it very difficult to detect oil. Ah, so that’s why BP is adamant about using them. We wouldn’t want Tony Hayward to lose another night’s sleep would we? His company’s grand plan is unfolding–use unprecedented amounts of toxic dispersants so Tony can get his life back. At least we’re getting closer to the truth.

P.S. BP was supposed to be at the forum but didn’t show….are you surprised?