conscious change Archives - Page 12 of 18 -

It’s the Little Things….

By Simone Lipscomb | September 7, 2013

I wasn’t really sure why the idea of a retreat to the Smoky Mountains came to me. I had been in a pretty weird place the past few months with no ability to focus on work. It felt as if I was lost in a big ocean with no rudder, wind or navigation aids. Frustration was building so I decided to take the month of August to do anything I wanted to do, even if it was doing nothing at all.

Doing is my trademark, it’s how people know me. Volunteering for one of several causes, preparing environmental education programs…always, always staying busy. But I had reached a point where I didn’t really know where to apply my energies. Nothing felt right except stillness, quiet….silence–not doing.

It was not easy untangling myself from the habit of busyness. I didn’t realize how much I used activity to distract myself. So at first…and honestly, the entire month….I really felt lost. Having removed the need to stay busy I struggled.

About the same time I took off a month from pushing myself to do something…to keep my mind busy…I began working out and putting my body into an intense series of classes, Pure Barre. The physical workouts were instrumental in shifting the stuck energy and the result was a clearer focus.

A little over a week ago I finally felt it was time to move forward and a short retreat in the Smoky Mountains was the idea that surfaced. I’m usually more of a planner but I wanted to be open to the flow. I packed my camera gear and clothes I’d need for woods and water and made reservations in a hotel in Townsend…the quiet side of the Smokies…far away from the chaos of Pigeon Forge or Gatlinburg…and very close to Cades Cove, one of a few of my most favorite places on the planet.

Somewhere in the few days of simply following my intuition and opening to the experience of not knowing or planning, some really amazing experiences occurred. And sometime Friday morning, along a narrow road while covered in dew and kissed by fog-filtered sunlight, I had a breakthrough that opened me. But it didn’t come from any prescribed path or formula…it came from simply being present with whatever presented itself and letting go of everything else. I lost myself in beauty…surrendered to it.

I was feeling glorious about the sunrise Friday morning and fog and light and flowers but it was hundreds of small spider webs that blanketed the grass and glowed with dew illuminated like diamonds that pulled me free. I stopped and gazed into endless sparkling works of spiders and started weeping. Life felt so full and so precious. Everything felt intensely sacred and holy. It seems like such a small thing to create such a huge inner shift.

The past few months have felt like my life was going through a shake-down. The real stuff was being separated from the husks and now I have some really beautiful little seeds to nurture. And a lot of my busy work I’ll be letting go of…including some volunteer efforts and work I thought I “should” do.

I suppose anything can help us open if we are ready. For me, though, it always seems to be the little things that push me over the edge into complete surrender, complete trust and therefore utter peace and contentment. With gratitude I complete this retreat and return to my everyday life with a vision.

How to Change the World

By Simone Lipscomb | August 16, 2013

Over a year ago I moved back to the Gulf Coast and at that time made the decision to delete television from my life. Unhooked from commercials and advertisements the freedom from bombarding marketing of one kind or another has been amazing. But I did want some way to watch movies, old television programs and documentaries so I opted to subscribe to Netflix.

I enjoy a bit of mindless entertainment from time to time; however, tonight I watched a program that quite literally changed my life.

In searching the ‘recently added’ programs I found, I Am. It is a documentary film created by a movie director who was in a cycling accident and during his recovery decided to ask two important questions: 1) What is wrong with the world; 2) What is the answer?

Many wise people were interviewed and scientific evidence was presented and demonstrated. My excitement grew as I watched. This movie answered many questions I’ve had over the past few months. I encourage interested folks to watch for themselves but here are a few key components.

First, it has been proven that our moods affect living systems around us. They showed how a person’s emotional energy impacted bacteria (living organisms) as measured by a change in electrical field. Simple organisms are affected by how we behave. I’ve been laughed at for hugging trees…of course that didn’t stop me…and now I know my love and appreciation for them is, on some level, felt. Can you imagine the possibilities? Studies done years ago about talking to your house plants and playing beautiful music helps them grow. The film showed yet another study that gave proof on how we can positively affect the world around us if we live with the intention to do so?

Conversely, if we practice anger and hate think what we are doing to those around us…and the planet…all living systems. Learning to cultivate compassion and love has never been so important. Letting go of negative emotions and thoughts has never been so necessary.

It was also shown in the film how we are not really separate. We are all connected. Have you ever had someone in your life and you knew something was going on with them even though you hadn’t talked in weeks….months? You just knew? Or you dreamed about them emailing you and when you awaken there’s an email…after months of not hearing from them. Love connects us. We are not separated by miles or time.

Another interesting point made by the film is the fact that we are wired, via our DNA, to have compassion and be cooperative. We have the potential to be violent and aggressive; however, we are hard-wired to love and help one another. Not just humans are genetically programmed to be cooperative, but many animals are as well.

In one study scientists set up cameras on fields where a herd of red deer grazed. They wanted to find out which deer led the herd to watering holes. Over and over again they watched in fascination as, one-by-one, the deer would raise their heads and look toward a watering hole. When the number of deer reached 51% of the herd the entire herd, as a group, simply wandered to the water. Unspoken consensus. Democracy in action.

Perhaps the most important idea I took away from the film was the fact that every act of kindness, compassion, good will we do is truly felt and therefore makes a positive difference. This is especially vital to understand as we live in a time of great unrest and fear as the ecosystems of our planet undergo intense changes due to climate change, where economic problems grow and tensions between citizens of all countries increase. Stepping away from conflict, practicing compassion and love for an animal, a place, a neighbor….it makes a difference!

Now is not the time to give up. It is the time to love boldly, act bravely through compassion and joy. This is how we change the world.

A Lightness of Being

By Simone Lipscomb | July 21, 2013

Sunday mornings, prior to sunrise, find me traversing an empty beach lot to the dune line. A short climb over ever-growing dunes and a quick walk across flat, sugar-white sand beach and voila! Wrack line. My target for the 1.5 mile search eastward.

I walk toward the rising sun. I’m looking for sea turtle tracks but this time of solitude at sunrise gives me space to be with the ocean, to open myself to the day and what life presents. Sounds great, right?

Today like most all other days I opted to carry my heavy camera, heavy super-wide angle lens and my carbon fiber tripod…not so heavy but after 3 miles it all starts to feel rather burdensome. I can’t help it though. Try as I might to leave the sturdy gear at home, the artist in me wants to see dawn through my lens. The environmentalist in me wants to pick up trash on the walk back. So a heavy trash day, like today, leaves me exhausted.

As I trudged back west picking up trash, the wind was blowing strongly against me. Lots of plastic in various forms littered the beach and so I was constantly bending over while trying to keep tripod and camera cases from falling off my tired shoulders. It was very frustrating….the trash, the soft sand and the heavy gear. I felt so weighed down.

Truthfully though, all of the stuff I was carrying was light compared to the inner burdens that were weighing me down. I struggled with my anger over trashy humans who throw garbage off of fishing boats, with tourists who leave plastic bottles, plastic caps, fireworks, plastic bags, and cigarette butts behind. After a mile and a half of gathering up the wastes humans left behind I felt weighed down with anger, frustration, feelings of hopelessness for our collective future and the health of our planet. And any other heavy emotion lingering about seems to pop up when I am tired. So hello my little friends….good to see you remember me. (Not!) Weary walking, this day. Very weary walking.

I was so exhausted toward the end of my walk I tried to push past trash rather than stop and put it in the already-heavy bag. But I couldn’t. I wanted to weep with fatigue and dehydration yet my love for the planet strengthened me to stop and collect the bits of garbage. I had to deal with it. I don’t want to do this! I’m tired, I silently whined. I wondered how long it would take the ghost crabs and other scavengers to pick my bones clean if I collapsed. And yes, I have a vivid imagination with a flair for the dramatic. Don’t artists always suffer for their work?

In spiritual studies, which are really studies in healing inner wounds, psychic debris and ego-driven living so our highest self can shine forth, I have sometimes wished for amnesia. Once a personality flaw is unearthed and brought to consciousness it won’t go away or get fixed by ignoring it. I thought of this as I picked up plastic garbage from the beach. Try as I might to walk past it I just couldn’t. My commitment to wildlife is to pick up this 1.5 mile stretch of beach every Sunday morning. Like my commitment to personal growth and healing leads me to keep working on myself no matter how tired or weighed down I feel. Oh, happy day. Right?

When I reached my car the feeling of letting everything go was amazing. The struggle had been great this day. Strong wind, soft sand, lots of trash…heavy gear. But the payoff…oh, the payoff. Feeling my heart and mind connect through my art. Knowing that the trash I collected will not harm innocent creatures…hoping that something I do will make a positive difference for the planet…this and singing to the sea gave me an incredible lightness of being.

The struggles? I still think it’s all worth it. Just look at this beautiful planet. Look at the sea!! And if you dare, look into my ever-lightening heart.

The Good Stuff Moves Closer

By Simone Lipscomb | July 7, 2013

The past three weeks have been incredibly difficult but I’m not whining. Simply stating a fact. The frustration has been centered around my work. Some days I have considered drawing a bullseye on the wall to give a target for head-banging.

Since I began documenting the BP Deepwater Horizon oil spill over three years ago, I have felt pressure to work hard to make a difference in the world. That’s always been my intention but since witnessing the devastating effects on wildlife and human life, I have been almost frantic to help raise awareness of what humans are doing to the planet.

This year I’ve been feeling the importance of documenting nature’s beauty as a way to increase passion and concern but with the same push–the panic thought that time is short, we are losing this beauty!

I’ve felt stuck lately…more than three weeks of stuck-ness. Months of it. I feel my work…the images and words….exist in a small circle of people. Appreciative and grateful people…but I’ve wondered if what I’m doing makes a difference. And the more I did, the more it felt as if I were treading ‘water’ in mud.

Two weeks ago I decided to let go and see what happened. This coincided with a question posed to me.

Each morning I light a candle, do a dedication and say a prayer. One day I specifically said, “Would you PLEASE show me what you want me to do?” Immediately and with a rush of force I heard, “What do YOU want to do?”

I stood astounded as my inner voice faded. Oh…so if I’m doing what I enjoy, it will be my best and most creative work and therefore fulfill my purpose. From that day on I have asked myself, “What do I want to do?” All through the day my work unfolds and when I focus on my website or do graphic design, or go on photography shoots it is effortless. It flows.

For the first time in many, many years I’m learning to relax and rest. When I work now it comes from my heart, not from a mental effort to push forward, to do, to make a difference, to work, work, work….because I have believed that it’s not okay to take up space unless I’m contributing. My mind loves to create things for me to do to justify my existence. But the fact is, that’s really not how it works. The more pressure I apply, the less I felt truly free to create my life’s work.

As I have stopped pushing and started breathing….living, the joy has returned. My work flows when I am in a creative mood and without the heavy hand I was using on myself, I feel lighter and more at peace than I have been since the oil spill occurred.

Joy, pleasure, happiness felt foreign to me since witnessing the spill and its effects. Slowly, I’m freeing myself from the self-imposed prison of my inner task master. As I do this the good stuff moves closer….I can FEEL it! My body vibrates with the goodness that has been waiting just out of reach. All it needed was a receptive spirit.

I am grateful.

Before the Dawn

By Simone Lipscomb | June 30, 2013

The Earth issues an invitation to commune with the light. Each Sunday morning I answer by rising before dawn and walking along the shore at the Gulf of Mexico. My purpose is to look for sea turtle tracks that indicate nesting activity but my intention is simply to listen and share with the salt water, the white-sand shores and the essence of light that, in my mind, is the creative force from which everything arises and to which it returns.

Dawn on the beach near Gulf Shores, Alabama

Being part of a dedicated team of individuals who love sea turtles and nature is rewarding. Its that affiliation that nudges me out of slumber and my list of excuses to make it to ‘church’ on time.

I started walking both ways in my section of beach to have more time in nature and to extend my time in communion with the nameless emanation of love…of light. I share aloud with the sea my grief at humanity’s sins against the planet and each other. I beam with excitement as the light changes prior to sunrise. The sight of a dolphin’s dorsal fin slicing through the surface ignites passion for and love of all creatures– the fish being chased and eaten by dolphins and sharks…and osprey; tiny coquina shells returning after being wiped out from the oil spill three years ago; ghost crabs….all life is sacred.

In the Sunday morning pilgrimage I look for sea turtle tracks and expand my heart energy walking east. After reaching the western most point in my section, I turn and walk back picking up trash left by humanity. Water bottles, cigarette butts, tampon applicators, boat bailing jugs, fishing lures, aluminum cans, rope, balloon bits and small bits of broken plastic. That was this morning’s haul. Later I’ll sort it into recycling and trash piles.

It is during this walk back where I especially feel grief as I gather in the sins of humanity into a garbage bag–the bits and pieces of cast-off junk thoughtlessly tossed or left to injure sea life, decompose over the next 500 years into toxic components. Oh, this is the challenging time in my conversation with light.

This morning, two things of notice happened. First, on my eastward trek I kept feeling a presence to my right. I looked out over the Gulf and saw a cloud, illuminated by dawn’s glory before the sun had peeked above the horizon. The magic of sunrise, the magic of light at work.

The Harry Potter nest this morning.... — The Harry Potter nest this morning….

The second little miracle was a sea turtle nest found by two of my patrol buddies on another section of ‘our’ beach. Life continues.

Sky from last year....the favorite photograph of light I've taken — Sky from last year…favorite photograph of light I’ve taken

And while answers haven’t been forthcoming so much lately, it could be true that it really is darkest just before the dawn. Let there be light!